Cancer won't ruin this girl's birthday....

It's been a little while since my last update as there hasn't really been much to speak of, I found the first couple of days following round 2 to be relatively easy-going but unfortunately by Saturday I was completely wiped-out. It's a type of tiredness and nausea I'd never experienced on their own, let alone as a double act. I think the lowest point was sitting in the shower unable to move even when the hot water had run out. The nurse tells me that overdoing it in the immediate days following chemo causes that to happen so I'll be sure to take a different approach next time around!

It's been great to be out and about with my team visiting stores and clocking-up countless eureka moments, if cancer didn't come with so many unfortunate side-effects I would be close to declaring it time very well spent. Recovery will require a return to the office routine in due-course but I'll do so with a much better appreciation for the effort it takes to run a good operation and the motivation to make life easier for the people who do.

We've ventured back down to Devon for a well-earned week off and included the requisite trip over to the Fox and Hounds in Eggesford for my birthday dinner and to reminisce about the multitude of brilliant memories we've created there with so many of you. 

We're looking forward to spending Easter weekend with the rest of our awesome family before heading back home for round three....... HALF WAY THROUGH CHEMO!!!

#fightlikeagirl

The one where Garry makes it all better....

Well, chemo round 2 again proved to be eventful but in a way that proved to be million times better than I could have imagined...

As you will remember, we started the week with lost hair and tears but I'm finishing it with a renewed sense of confidence and a completely different perspective on just how far I've already come on this journey.

I can't begin to describe how pleased I was to be rid of the cold cap for this week's chemo session and must take my hat off to Dr Mathew who was adamant that there would be no puking this time around - he was absolutely spot-on. I've been feeling pretty nauseous and tired but I'll will take that over my previous experience any-day! 

The week has been topped-off by a visit to Scruffs' of Cambridge where Garry gradually built-up my confidence with his astounding array of wigs and incredible expertise, he made me feel more feminine and confident than I have since my diagnosis (it also helps that my body hair is now falling off - awesome!)

I had always considered the description of cancer as a "roller-coaster" to be an unfortunate cliche but I honestly can't think of any better way to describe it. The experience opens your eyes to the things in your life that you truly are blessed with whilst also taking you to some pretty damn dark places. For the first time in the last 4 months I feel as though I can say that I have a handle on this and am looking to the future. #fightlikeagirl

The one where my hair falls out......

"She'd only ever loved two things; the first was her long dark hair, the second was how she could cut it off and not feel a thing...." 

Hello lovely people

 As you have likely skilfully deduced from the title - the ice cap didn't work! They warned me that I may start to lose hair 2 weeks after the first chemo session and they were spot on. It started coming out gradually earlier in the week, I was hoping that this was somehow related to my transition back to work but alas, come Saturday night I was pulling it out in clumps and floods of tears. We made the decision to ask my gorgeous cousin-in-law Lizzie to head over with her clippers and do the deed, the only currency she would accept was a bowl of the legendary Bliss chilli and I'm pleased to report that we were both very happy customers. 

I knew that I didn't want it to be done Britney-style in a public barber shop so to have a house full of family and friends with a glass of wine in hand and kids tearing around the house was absolutely perfect. I donned the requisite UWO Shave to Save tank top for the event and was surprisingly tearless throughout (I think the wine helped!). The kids asked a few questions as they passed through the kitchen but they all seemed to accept it and move-on in the beautiful way that children do.

I'm liking the idea of a Kelly Osbourne style purpleish wig but have been unable to locate one as-yet, wigs and scarves can indeed be fun to shop for and many of you have so kindly offered to help on the expeditions! 

Chemo round 2 starts tomorrow and I'm not sorry to admit that I'm glad I won't have to put up with the ice cap again. My Oncologist is adamant that there will be no more trips back to hospital this time around and I will gladly hold him to that! The installation of my SmartPort will also make the process far easier and will allow me to lie on the sofa watching mind-numbing tv rather than being hooked up to all sorts of cables and machines. 

I will certainly keep you posted.....

#fightlikeagirl

The battle scar gallery.....

"You're very calm for someone about to go into surgery" said the nurse

"I've had surgery every month so far this year" said I.

With the portacath procedure now complete, I'm hoping that my next visit to theatre will just be for my sweet reconstruction job at the end of the year! 

I thought I'd share with you some of the photos to mark the end of the surgical journey, the expander seems to be doing it's job of allowing me to fake-it through chemo and, with the help of rosehip oil, all of the scars seem to be healing beautifully.

Mastectomy                                 Axillary Clearance               Portacath

                 

Erica received a lovely surprise package in the post from a wonderful friend at clicsargent, it included a chemoduck and Barbie's friend Ella who is bald but comes with a selection of wigs and hats. They have really helped our conversations about chemotherapy and hospital visits. You can find a video of the grand unwrapping here.

Now that we are full-swing into this chemotherapy lark, my brain needs something to look forward to. The video from our awesome summer holiday last year has provided much inspiration for an epic trip in 2016 with our fabulous friends.... no pressure Green's, Curtis' and Phillips'!

#fightlikeagirl

I may be speaking a bit too soon..... but chemo doesn't seem that bad!

Last week was eventful to say the least, when I returned home from hospital I was starting to feel full of energy and had an insatiable appetite (making up for lost time!), unfortunately I started to feel thoroughly rubbish on Saturday; I was exhausted and freezing cold, after spending much of the day with numerous layers and wrapped in blankets we finally had the bright idea to take my temperature and realised that things weren't Disney. Northampton A&E were brilliant and rushed me through so that I could get hooked up to an IV and antibiotics, it turns out that I had an infected seroma which is where fluid from the last operation had become infected - bad news for a weakened immune system.

Thankfully this time the expulsion of bodily fluids were kept to a minimum and the brilliant A&E staff brought cornflakes and tea to stop me whinging about the hunger! My ever-sympathetic husband made many attempts to take a photo of me sitting on the commode while hooked-up to oxygen and the drips but mercifully the monstrosity you see here is as bad as the evidence gets.

As I had an infection I was lucky enough to have my own room on the ward and  enjoyed my bedside visit from Dr Bliss, she diagnosed an "owie foot" and promptly ordered me out of the bed so that her dolly could receive the urgent treatment that she required. I managed to leave hospital with Erica and Nathan the following day with a course of antibiotics to keep the nasties at bay.

The irony of it all is this: when I'm not having an overreaction to the drugs or fighting an infection I feel brilliant, it's not bouncing off the walls brilliant but I have a decent level of energy and feel pretty good about things. I've started working from home again this week and am planning some ventures out to stores to spend some time with my team as I think my incessant phone calls are starting to become a nuisance! 

The week would be normal if it weren't for a visit to the cardiovascular surgeon tomorrow to insert a portacath into my chest, in a surreal way I'm looking forward to it so that my arm can start to heal as it is starting to look like it belongs to a heroin addict.

#fightlikeagirl