Saturday, 25 April 2015

Fighting through the dark days....

Round 3 of FEC was not without its challenges - I think the cumulative effect had started to kick-in - although I'm pleased that the super-expensive antiemetics have stopped the vomiting, the residual nausea and fatigue are completely debilitating.

Some people (foolishly) say that I should welcome the opportunity to lie in front of the tv for 4 days but the drugs mess with your head too making it impossible to make sense of what's happening around you. I must admit, those are my lowest points and the ones when I shed the most tears as it starts to feel like cancer is winning, however, the most important thing to remember is that the treatment is doing this, not the cancer and it's doing this because it's kicking cancer's butt!

That said, the dark days really do add perspective, they make you appreciate the "green days" as my team have aptly named them - the days where I feel well and full of energy. The team have landed some spectacular ninja projects over the last couple of weeks and refuse to let this hold them back, I have been so lucky to have the support of M&S to work flexibly and still have such a rewarding job to put my energy into, it has proven to me that you really should choose an employer that aligns to your own personal values.

So, round 4 starts on Tuesday and I'm trying very hard to remain positive. As it is a brand new set of chemo drugs I am terrified that we'll see a repeat of round 1 but the Oncology team have already proven that they know how to handle every possible adverse reaction and I'm confident that I couldn't be in better hands. I promise to let you know how it goes and will do my best to stay off the KFC while on the steroids!